' ' Cinema Romantico: (Not) Playing With The Boys

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

(Not) Playing With The Boys

Recently, late at night, looking for a movie showing on TV to which I could drift off, I happened upon 1986's #1 box office hit "Top Gun" showing on Bravo. Perfect, I thought, and settled in to watch the scene where Tom Cruise asks out Kelly McGillis and she shoots him down except she really doesn't and "slyly" hands him the note telling him to be at her place later that night and then Tom Cruise gets up to leave which leads to this memorable exchange:

Slider: "Crash and burn, huh, Mav?"
Maverick: "Slider, you stink."


Then I smiled for I knew precisely what was coming next, perhaps the film's greatest sequence - the volleyball game between Tom Cruise, Anthony Edwards, Val Kilmer, and Rick Rossovich set to Kenny Loggins' immortal "Playing With The Boys". I couldn't wait!

Except the next thing I knew the movie was cutting to Tom Cruise roaring down a beachfront road on his motorcycle to the soft strains of "Take My Breath Away" and then he was showing up, late, at Kelly McGillis's house for dinner. "Where's the volleyball scene?" I literally asked aloud to an empty room. Now I was wide awake. No drifting off. I was confused - incensed, even. This is worse than the time they colorized "It's A Wonderful Life", I thought. I rewound the DVR to make sure my eyes had not deceived me. They had not.

BRAVO EDITED OUT THE VOLLEYBALL SCENE IN "TOP GUN".

What is "From Here To Eternity" without Burt Lancaster and Deborah Kerr making out on the beach? What is "Ben Hur" without the chariot race? What is "Dr. Strangelove" without Slim Pickens riding the nuclear bomb? What is "There's Something About Mary" without the hair gel?

And what, I ask, is "Top Gun" without the volleyball scene?

4 comments:

Wretched Genius said...

>>And what, I ask, is "Top Gun" without the volleyball scene?<<

Straight?

Nicholas Prigge said...

Wait....is that it??? That didn't even dawn on me. Was Bravo trying to tone down the supposed homosexual undertones of this film?

Does this mean they can't show that scene in Illinois but they can in Iowa? If so, are people going to start petitions to have this scene edited out in Iowa?

Rory Larry said...

Somehow I think the network that brought us Queer Eye for the Straight Guy is not worried about homosexual undertones. I'm guessing they edited it for time given it is an entirely superfluous scene.

Nicholas Prigge said...

Entirely superfluous? ENTIRLEY SUPERFLUOUS??!! You dare to call the volleyball scene in "Top Gun" superfluous?

If you're a movie fan, Rory, then I'm ashamed to call myself one.