Re-Seeing Alicia Silverstone

As I explained a few months ago, Alicia Silverstone, a year older than me, was my most significant (and most utterly unattainable) high school era crush, the lilting protagonist who spoke for the entire lot of supposedly disenfranchised Gen-X'ers in Aerosmith's "Cryin'" video. Eventually, when I got older, I moved on. Ms. Silverstone moved on, too. Which was why it floored me when while watching "The Art Of Getting By" I suddenly realized she was on the movie screen in front of me.

The Alicia Silverstone of then.

Silverstone's Cher Horowitz of "Clueless", as you might recall, was the queen bee of Bronson Alcott High School who memorably aided in the love of her male debate teacher. In "The Art Of Getting By" she lends a helping hand to our young male protagonist specifically because she is that protagonist's......English teacher. Full circle. Help me, Rhonda.

Silverstone, to me, was still always Cher or the girl getting her belly button pierced and karate chopping that guy who would go on to a certain level of fame in a show on an island in the face. But now she was all grown up.

The Alicia Silverstone of now. And you know what? I'm okay with it. So piss off.

Her eyes were assisted by thick glasses, her hair was pulled back in a decidedly unfetching bun and she appeared to have a pimple on her forehead that she must have insisted she wanted to show up on camera because, hey, the makeup department could have cleaned that up in a jiffy. She was an English teacher, but she was dressed like a librarian. Long gone was the flannel, combat boots wearing rebellious femme fatale that flipped off Stephen Dorff in the ultimate act of meaningless meaning. She probably likes to stay at home on Fridays now with a Netflix DVD and get to bed 'round about 10:30. Alicia Silverstone is a person in her mid-30's. Just like me.

Oddly, or perhaps not, I don't think she's ever looked more beautiful.