' Cinema Romantico: Five Actors To Play The Next Bourne Movie Governmental Antagonist

Wednesday, July 27, 2016

Five Actors To Play The Next Bourne Movie Governmental Antagonist

The Bourne movies are defined, obviously, by Jason Bourne, the brainwashed black ops karate master played by Matt Damon, except for "The Bourne Legacy" where he was played by Jeremy Renner. Yet these movies are equally defined by Jason Bourne's obligatory governmental antagonist, or occasionally part-sympathizer, played by an impressive list of heavyweights, like Chris Cooper, Brian Cox, Joan Allen, David Straithairn, and Edward Norton. The most recent entry to this governmental antagonist list, featured in the forthcoming "Jason Bourne", opening this week, will be played by the none other than the infamously irascible Tommy Lee Jones. And it got us to thinking. It got us to thinking about who will play the governmental antagonist in the next Bourne movie...say, "Bourne Again"? Listicle!!!

Five Actors To Play The Next Bourne Movie Governmental Antagonist 

Denzel Washington

As the CIA's vaguely defined "Senior Secret Consultant", Washington's Xavier Thirdkill emerges in flashbacks as the man who really trained Bourne, off site, in the Himalayas, Henri Ducard to Bourne's Bruce Wayne. And now that Bourne cannot be stopped, Thirdkill will have to leave the office for the field, a la Darth Vader at the end of the first "Star Wars", meaning we can pit "Bourne Again" as Denzel vs. Damon so that either 1.) Bourne can finally be killed since it's Denzel and Denzel can't lose or 2.) Denzel finally realizes he has found his own Denzel and happily passes the torch so he can retire from action movies.

Jane Kaczmarek

Kaczmarek co-stars as Gillian Gibbs, new chief analytics officer at Polydeuces Credit Union. However, due to several mix-ups up and down the chain of command, Gillian has no idea that Polydeuces is just a CIA front and that the "analytics" department is code for "black ops". Before her first week is over, the hefty file on Jason Bourne has been dropped on her desk since he's just re-appeared on the grid in Zurich and with nothing but guile and endlessly re-fillable travel coffee mug, Gibbs is forced to orchestrate a global pursuit of Jason Bourne without even being able to check her email because the CIA hasn't set up her password yet.

Michael Rapaport

"I've got three words for you, all right? Fuck Jason Bourne. All right? Fuck that guy. And don't lay his backstory guilt trip on me, all right? I don't want hear that sob story bullshit. He's fucked up? Big fucking deal. I got news for you, it's the CIA. We're all fucked up. They pulled me outta my 9th grade statistics class, stuck me in an accelerated intelligence agency program and I haven't been outta this fucking building since. I haven't seen more than forty five minutes of sunlight - TOPS - in forty fucking years, all right. Cry me a fucking river, Jason Bourne. I'm gonna put your whiny ass in a pine box, ya understand? We got six thousand Jason Bournes in this place, it can't be that fucking difficult. You know why it took them so long to kill Jaws? Because they sent one fucking boat! We're gonna send a hundred fucking boats, all right? A hundred aircraft carriers with a hundred nuclear warheads and shoot every single one of them straight up his fucking ass."

Frank Vincent

With the CIA fnally realizing that despite their immense resources they will never be able to stop Jason Bourne, a CIA officer is tasked with making secret contact with a member of the Las Vegas syndicate, Gordon the Gasbag (Kevin Corrigan), who puts them in touch with legendary mafia kingpin Frankie Poblano (Frank Vincent) about making their problem go away. "Get a couple guys and dig a hole in the desert. And when I'm ready, I'll tell you, 'Go get Jason Bourne.' And you make him disappear, you know what I mean?"

A Bunch Of Suits At A Table

Remember the scene in "Zero Dark Thirty" when Leon Panetta gathers a bunch of Important People at a conference table to see who thinks Osama bin Laden is really in that Abbottabad compound? And no one can agree with any exact certainty about whether or not Osama bin Laden is really in that house? And Leon Panetta asks "Do you guys ever agree on anything?"And so rather than "Bourne Again" this will be "The Bourne Compromise" as we follow Bourne making his way toward Langley, evading those sent to dispatch him, who primarily fail because the people back at the conference table can't ever agree on anything. The final scene finds Bourne bursting into the conference room. None of the suits can agree on who should pull their weapon.

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