' Cinema Romantico: Happy Trails, Titanic

Monday, February 01, 2010

Happy Trails, Titanic

So it's happened. James Cameron has ended the run of James Cameron atop the all-time movie box office charts. "Avatar" has surpassed "Titanic". A tear...

Oh, I liked "Avatar", but by no means did I love it. Not like I loved "Titanic". It brought me close to God and it ignited my Winslet Infatuation. To this day it still tugs on my heartstrings. No doubt one day at the Siskel Center I'll find myself in a knife fight with some cinéaste who condemns its "broad themes". And so in honor of its final days as the Box Office Champion I have decided to compose a poem in its memory by employing some of its "famous" and "quality" dialogue. Enjoy! If not, go rent "Transformers 2" and leave me alone.

I saw the iceberg
And I see it in your eyes
Please tell me the truth.

I fell for this movie
Like Churchill fell
once he’d had too much vermouth.

It's like being inside a dream
Or something
There's truth but no logic.

It’s why once every year
No questions asked
I sit down to watch it.

Water that cold
Hits you like a thousand knives
Stabbing you all over your body

It's the same as when Rose
Said her last name was Dawson
And sent me weeping into the lobby.

She looked at him like an insect
A dangerous insect
Which must be squashed quickly.

Thomas Andrews became my hero
Not for his grace
But for parenting Sydney.

with the number of lifeboats
times the capacity you mentioned
it seems that there aren't enough for everyone aboard

Titanic, my Titanic
You will always be George Washington
Avatar is just a big bunch of Gerald Ford.

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