' ' Cinema Romantico: My All Time Top 10 Totally Subjective Favorite Woody Allen Movie Quotes

Friday, November 05, 2010

My All Time Top 10 Totally Subjective Favorite Woody Allen Movie Quotes

Anymore when I see a Woody Allen movie I find myself vaguely disappointed (i.e. "You Will Meet A Tall Dark Stranger") and becoming nostalgic for his past work and, of course, becoming nostalgic for the past is a violently slippery slope but then I'm the guy who 17 seconds after the Ra Ra Riot show I saw on October 5th at the Metro had ended started feeling seriously nostalgic for it and so that's just the way it is and, anyway, this is my blog and I can do what I want. So let's revisit a happier time. (I have made notes to provide context when necessary. Also, I limited myself to a single quote from any one movie to make it a little more challenging. Really, this whole thing could just be "Annie Hall" quotes.)

My All Time Top 10 Totally Subjective Favorite Woody Allen Movie Quotes:

10. "I'd like to learn how to spell Connecticut. Don't ask me why. I never knew how to spell Connecticut." - Small Time Crooks (1999)

(And don't ask me why that particular line makes me laugh so hard every time because I don't know. It just does.)

9. "Do me a favor, go back to Athens!" - Mighty Aphrodite (1995)

(This is what Woody yells at the ongoing Greek Chorus at a particularly delicate moment.)

8. "A week ago I bought a rifle. If they told me I had a tumor, I was gonna kill myself. The only thing that might have stopped me is that my parents would be devastated. I'd have to shoot them too. First. And then I have an aunt and uncle, you know, it would've been a blood bath." - Hannah and Her Sisters (1986)

7. "Well, a satirical piece in the Times is one thing but bricks and baseball bats really gets right to the point." - Manhattan (1979)

6. "It'll be great because all those Ph.D.'s will be out there discussing modes of alienation and we'll be in here quietly humping." - Annie Hall (1977)

5. "I know exactly what I think about all this but I can never find words to put it in.  Maybe if I get a little drunk I could dance it." - Shadows and Fog (1991)

4. -"That's quite a lovely Jackson Pollock, isn't it?
-"Yes, it is.
-"What does it say to you?
-"It restates the negativeness of the universe. The hideous lonely emptiness of existence. Nothingness. The predicament of Man forced to live in a barren, Godless eternity like a tiny flame flickering in an immense void with nothing but waste, horror and degradation, forming a useless bleak straitjacket in a black absurd cosmos."
-"What are you doing Saturday night?"
-"Committing suicide."
-"What about Friday night?"

- Play It Again, Sam (1972)

3. "I never believed in God. I used to think even if He exists, He's done such a terrible job it's a wonder people don't get together and file a class action suit against Him." - Everyone Says I Love You (1996)

(This line was actually spoken by Alan Alda's character but, come on, it's got the Woodman all over it.)

2. "We fell in love. Well, I fell in love. She just stood there." - Bananas (1971)

1. "I'm not really the heroic type. I was beaten up by Quakers." - Sleeper (1973)


Andrew: Encore Entertainment said...

Nothing from Bullets Over Broadway? Blasphemy!

Even though it's not my favourite Woody film (Hannah & Her Sisters and Annie Hall battle it out) - it's my favourite Woody script.

Kudos for #2 and #3 especially though. Brilliant.

Nicholas Prigge said...

If I was doing a Woody Allen Iconic Lines List then "Don't speak" would have made it. In fact, "Don't speak" almost made this list but there is just something, something I can't explain, about that "Connecticut" line that I love a little more.

Also, if I was making a Woody Allen Characters List, Cheech would be on it. Probably in the Top 5. I love Cheech. He's the real Cheech, if you ask me.

Lexi said...

I LOVE #5 and #2!!